Analyzing a Trend First Draft

Teen’s use of alcohol has a lot of different effects on them, mostly negative. Cristol says the proportion of American children who start drinking alcohol in or before eighth grade has increased by nearly one-third since 1975, according to the National Center on Addiction and Substance Abuse (CASA) at Columbia University in New York. Also, that girl’s are now just as likely to drink as boys.

Adolescents with alcohol use disorders reported symptoms of health problems in many areas, including sleep difficulties, chest discomfort, breathing symptoms, abdominal complaints, muscle and joint pain, and headaches. The study, however, also found some negative health signs in teens with alcohol use disorders. Blood samples showed that young people with alcohol use disorders had elevated liver enzyme levels and had more abnormalities uncovered in physical exams. Physical exam abnormalities showed up mainly in oral exams. Clark said that adolescents with alcohol problems have inadequate health maintenance behaviors, including less-than-regular tooth brushing, which causes dental cavities and gingivitis. (Cristol)

Alcohol is linked to the top three causes of teen deaths: suicide, homicide, and accidents, including traffic fatalities and drowning. Alcohol can also play a role in irresponsible and potentially dangerous sexual behavior. Compared with teens who don't drink, teenage drinkers are seven times likelier to have sex and twice as likely to have sex with four or more partners. Alcohol-influenced sexual behavior can result in unprotected sex, increasing the risk of AIDS, other sexually transmitted diseases, and pregnancy, Califano says. n part, the alcohol and entertainment industries are to blame, the report finds. Children and teens are bombarded with TV ads glorifying beer during sports programs, and images like Budweiser's talking lizards have tremendous youth appeal. The alcohol industry also lures minors with sweet-tasting, colorfully packaged drinks. More than 40% of teens have tried beverages like Tequiza and Smirnoff Ice. Meanwhile, the entertainment industry has glamorized and sexualized alcohol in many children's movies. An analysis of 81 G-rated animated films revealed that nearly 50% showed characters using alcohol, often without consequence. In addition, 34% of the movies equated alcohol with wealth, 19% with sexual activity. While the alcohol and entertainment industries may be influencing minors to drink, "we have to point the finger at ourselves," Califano says. Children cite other people's houses as the most common setting for drinking. And one-third of sixth- and ninth-graders get alcohol from their own homes. "Parents tend to see drinking and occasional bingeing as a rite of passage, rather than a deadly round of Russian roulette." (“Researchers…”)

Works Cited

Cristol, Hope. "Teen Drinking Is on the Rise." Futurist 36.4 (2002): 14. Academic Search Premier. EBSCO. Web. 29 Nov. 2010.

"Researchers find health problems among teen drinkers." DATA: The Brown University Digest of Addiction Theory & Application 20.10 (2001): 7. Academic Search Premier. EBSCO. Web. 29 Nov. 2010.

Annotating a Scholarly Article First Draft Post Write

1. How do you feel about the paper so far? Please explain and offer evidence from the work.

So far I have my full citation at the top. I have started my first paragraph, but it still needs to be completed. I have used parenthesis when I have used something from the article. I have stated who wrote this, and I am trying to summarize what the author has said.

2. What remains to be done? Please be precise.

I need to finish my first paragraph and I need to do my second paragraph. In the first paragraph I need to explain more about what each kind of approach is and why teachers prefer direct instruction.

3. What questions do you have for readers about the piece?

Does it make sense so far? I know it isn’t much but is what I have there understandable?

Annotating a Scholrly Article First Draft

Cobb, Aries. “To differentiate or not to differentiate? Using internet-based technology in the classroom.” Quarterly Review of Distance Education 11.1 (2010): 37+. Academic OneFile. Web. 9 Nov. 2010.

In the report Cobb looks at whether educators differentiate instruction, or should they use direct instruction when using Internet-based software in the K-12 classroom. The Cleveland Metropolitan School District was targeted school. They used a program called Compass Learning which “is an Internet-based software program that differentiates instruction, prescribes learning paths, allows students to work cooperatively, and increases overall student achievement in reading skills for the targeted students.” (1) Cobb says “abundant research indicates that direct instruction is the preferred style of teaching in urban schools.”

Post Write for Proposal Second Draft

1. How do you feel about the paper so far? Please explain and offer evidence from the work.

So far I feel that the paper is coming along alright. I feel like I have stated the problem. I have started to state how to fix the problem, but I feel like I could add more. I have also used a quote from someone who this has actually happened to provide support as to why this needs to be addressed. I think I need to elaborate more on how to solve the problem, and I think I can do that by adding some more information.

2. What remains to be done? Please be precise.

I should use information from a news source to prove my point, and not just a quote from someone this has happened to. I also need to add more information to the paper, especially about how to solve the problem.

3. What questions do you have for readers about the piece?

Do my solutions to the problem seem reasonable? Is everything organized in the right place?

Proposal Second Draft

Two of your classes were cancelled before the first week of the semester. You are going to address your proposal to the college administrator in charge, making clear to document the problem carefully and offering realistic solutions.

            I work full time and go to school full time, and I live on my own. My work schedule is planned around my school schedule. When one week before classes begin two of my classes are cancelled it really throws off my schedule. The chances of me being able to fill those two spots with other classes I needed or would be able to take are very slim being that close to the start of the semester. If I had to take classes at a different time I would have to change my work schedule and that is not easy for me to do. If I’m not able to work as many hours then I will not be able to afford to live on my own.  We have to do something about this.

            We have to change this some how. The college should take a look at non-required classes and see which ones are popular and which ones are not. The classes that are not popular should not be offered.  If enough people do not sign up for a class being offered, then that should be decided earlier than a week before the semester starts. Other people are also going to need to know earlier if classes are going to be cancelled. Cassie, 18, a college student, also runs a tight schedule. She is a mother and a full time college student. She has a babysitter watch her daughter while she is in school. She has had two classes cancelled the week before the semester starts and she could not get two more classes to fill those spots. She had to changer her whole schedule for the semester because she could not change her babysitter on such a short notice. “It is such an inconvenience for me. I wish the school would have given me more notice if a class was going to be cancelled or not.” There has to be a better way for the college to decide on keeping a class or not, and there has to be a better way to let students know about their classes being cancelled.

            It is a major inconvenience for us students with very busy schedules to have classes cancelled a week before the semester was to begin. Most students have very busy lives and they plan everything around their school schedules, and if something suddenly changed on short notice they would have to completely rearrange all of their other schedules. A way to solve this problem is for the school to only offer the required classes students need, and the popular electives students want to take.

Post Write for Proposal First Draft

1. How do you feel about the paper so far? Please explain and offer evidence from the work.

So far I feel that the paper is coming along alright. I feel like I have stated the problem. I have started to state how to fix the problem, but I feel like I could add more. I have also used a quote from someone who this has actually happened to provide support as to why this needs to be addressed.

2. What remains to be done? Please be precise.

I need to add some more evidence to how to fix this problem, and I need to put in a conclusion.

3. What questions do you have for readers about the piece?

Do my solutions to the problem seem reasonable? Is everything seem to organized in the right place?

Proposal First Draft

Two of your classes were cancelled before the first week of the semester. You are going to address your proposal to the college administrator in charge, making clear to document the problem carefully and offering realistic solutions.

            I work full time and go to school full time, and I live on my own. My work schedule is planned around my school schedule. When one week before classes begin two of my classes are cancelled it really throws off my schedule. The chances of me being able to fill those two spots with other classes I needed or would be able to take are very slim being that close to the start of the semester. If I had to take classes at a different time I would have to change my work schedule and that is not easy for me to do. If I’m not able to work as many hours then I will not be able to afford to live on my own.  We have to do something about this.

            We have to change this some how. The college should take a look at non-required classes and see which ones are popular and which ones are not. The classes that are not popular should not be offered.  If enough people do not sign up for a class being offered, then that should be decided earlier than a week before the semester starts. Other people are also going to need to know earlier if classes are going to be cancelled. Cassie, 18, a college student, also runs a tight schedule. She is a mother and a full time college student. She has a babysitter watch her daughter while she is in school. She has had two classes cancelled the week before the semester starts and she could not get two more classes to fill those spots. She had to changer her whole schedule for the semester because she could not change her babysitter on such a short notice. “It is such an inconvenience for me. I wish the school would have given me more notice if a class was going to be cancelled or not.”